What the FLEB? How the Female Lifestyle Empowerment Brand Swindles You Out of Your Money

Mainstream manifestation is ALL about putting the onus on individuals without addressing or substantially acknowledging systems of oppression.

Do you know about FLEBs?

Yeah, it's a gross word and I love it.

It's actually an acronym that feminist copywriter, coach, and founder of#WeAreTheCultureMakers, Kelly Diels, came up with that stands for Female Lifestyle Empowerment Brand.

Diels writes, "FLEBs use highly feminized photos of themselves in luxury locations with luxury objects in order to quickly manufacture social authority. They deliberately signal high social status, wealth, and unearned privilege because they know that humans subconsciously associate those status signals with power and leadership...which means in sales funnels we're predisposed to obey our 'authorities' and by."

Here are all the tactics FLEBs use to brand, market, and sell their products/services:

• Fake authority

• Fake scarcity

• Male approval

• Predatory payment plans

• Weaponized white femininity

• Relentless positivity and conflict avoidance

• Reinforces gender binary and Patriarchy

• Safe status quo images

• Testimonials as triggers

Fake authority: Making thousands or millions in your business does not a business expert make. Being able to work from anywhere does not a business expert make. FLEBs manipulate the consumer’s subconscious by displaying photos of themselves in luxury locations or buying expensive things to suggest that because of their business success they’ve been able to afford this grand lifestyle.

But FLEBs actually rely on so much unearned privilege to get their businesses off the ground. Often FLEBs also have the support and double income of their partner or spouse. But they don’t talk about this.

Fake scarcity: have you ever signed up for an email list and then the person was trying to sell something with a countdown timer? Or heard, “You’ll never be able to get this offer again.” Yeah, that subconsciously triggers a sense of scarcity in our brain and is a catalyst for us making decisions out of our survival brain instead of our pre-frontal cortex (the place where we can make calm, clear, rational, and grounded decisions).

Male approval: Displaying your proximity to cishet white men signals power. Many FLEBs litter their Instagram with photos of their significant other, or market their connection to high-profile cis men as a way to assert their own authority. Because if a cis man approves it’s gotta be legit, right?

Predatory payment plans: Charging excessive finance fees or extra for payment plans is financial abuse. There’s nothing empowering about punishing those who need financial assistance.

Weaponized white femininity: There’s nothing wrong with investing in a photo shoot for your brand, but FLEBs lean into white beauty standards, pretty privilege, and the gender binary to cultivate their online presence. This subconsciously tells their audience that they are to be trusted because in our white supremacist society white women are seen as “pure,” “innocent,” and “good.”

Relentless positivity and conflict avoidance: it’s become more popular these days to discuss burn-out and “real emotions,” which is more of a reflection of how “self-care,” a concept that Audre Lorde spoke about first, has become commodified and appropriated by white people. Nevertheless, even if you come across a FLEB like Manifestation Babe who discourages “toxic positivity,” you’ll never see her directly address systems of oppression in any kind of meaningful way. The FLEB modus operandi is not to disrupt the status quo at all. It’s to maintain it.

Reinforces gender binary and patriarchy: This is when FLEBs talk about “Divine Masculine/Feminine.” This language is actually reinforcing traditional gender roles, behaviors, and expectations, and simultaneously erases Queer, non-binary, trans, and two-spirit folks. Masculine and feminine characteristics are not determined by one’s genitals, but FLEBs insinuate this by using their boyfriend or spouse to play the role of the “Divine Masculine.”

Safe status quo images: Kelly Diels writes, “FLEBs use safe imagery that’s easy to consume because it aligns with social roles & expectations:⁠⠀STATUS. The people in the photos will have socially desirable bodies/identities. (No fat people. No wheelchairs. Etc.)⁠⠀POSITIVITY. Quote cards will be platitudes that make us feel comfortable⁠⠀APOLITICAL. If they do quote revolutionaries, it’s for cool points, without any political context (Ivanka Trump’s brand used to quote WOC and civil rights icons all.the.time)⁠”

Testimonials as triggers: Testimonials can sometimes offer helpful information and give us an idea of what we can expect from a class, product, or service. But oftentimes, FLEBs will select the testimonials that reflect the highest performing, or most successful anomalies among their customer base to convey the idea that this could be your success too.

Also, FLEBs often have clauses in their terms of agreement that say participants aren’t allowed to speak poorly or negatively about their experience, or they will face legal consequences. The terms are hidden and often you buying their product is the same as agreeing to the terms. Rachael Kay Albers has pointed out how many FLEBs including Marie Forleo has done this.

This not to shame anyone if you’ve used these tactics. Many business programs teach this and when you’re a new entrepreneur you understandably assume this is just what you do. I was taught these exploitative tactics when I first started and have had to unlearn A LOT.

But now that we know better we can do better.

Have you seen these tactics being used? What’s been your experience with them? Feel free to email me your thoughts at erin@erinkmonahan.com or DM me on Instagram @erin.k.monahan

P.S. If you’re new here: Hey! I’m Erin, a trauma-informed coach and astrologer.

I help anti-capitalist creatives and entrepreneurs heal their money trauma and all things related to the 2nd house. In astrology the 2nd house represents our self-worth, personal income, assets, skills, and gifts!

Did you know?!

I’m teaching a FREE, live workshop THIS SATURDAY, August 13 at 12pm CT called, “No Bullshit Manifestation” where I’ll teach you what manifestation is really all about with zero spiritual bypassing and ample discussion about systems of oppression. At the end, I’ll tell you all about my upcoming program, “Healing Through the Second House,” where you can access deeper support in healing your relationship to manifestation, your self-worth, personal income, assets, skills, talents, and gifts.

Get ready to learn how to begin healing your relationship with manifestation and tap into your power and agency.

I can’t wait to see you there!